Ode to friendship

"Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends". Eminem

Let me say at the outset that I never thought that I'd ever listen to Eminem.. let alone quote him. But if a friend you trust tells you there's merit in listening to Eminem... well then you listen to him..and quote him.

But here's the thing...I would have agreed with him a couple of years ago. But not anymore.

My friends circle has been very small..I too don't trust easily, and I was doing just fine with the two I had. And then a third friend just happened... when I was least expecting it.

And unlike the other two, this one just came in and threw the way I looked at things off kilter. And I started to look at things differently. I slowly started to look at everything from all kinds of perspectives.

Going through the worst phase of my life, I clung to the three of them like white on rice. And they let me...held my hand, bolstered my sagging spirit, spoke encouraging words, gave me tough love...the last one was the most needed  one...the one that toughened me up. The saying...and I'm paraphrasing here...about true friends telling what you need to hear and not what you want to hear...is so very true.

I was hiding from the world, licking my wounds in private, blindly going through the motions, introspecting a lot, slowly gaining my confidence, like a fledgling with one wing out of the nest.

The need to prove myself... to myself, and my loved ones...made me desperate at times. Countless hours I spent wondering whether I should just quit, forget about it, or gird my loins and take that first flight out of my insecure world. My friends sustained me through it all, and applauded my efforts, gave me suggestions, nudged me when I went off course.

And they gave me my confidence back... and some new friends. New friends who took on my case like determined soldiers, merely on the words of the mutual friends we shared. These new friends championed my cause, working in the background, to make sure I succeeded in my quest.

Suddenly there were cloudless sunny skies, where there had been a gloomy outcast; a hint of hope in the air, where there had been stifling silence. Suddenly things started to look up, and I rode on that wave of hope.

And rediscovered some old friends, who welcomed me back into their warm embrace, with nary a thought of my earlier extended silence. The outpouring of joy from that quarter fuelled my flight even more.

It is heartening to know that it doesn't matter what you've done...or not done...to the people who actually care for you. Yes, the need to prove myself is what is keeping me going, but it is also the assurance that there is this wonderful cheerleader squad on my side.

God does work in mysterious ways...an altogether too often used statement.. a cliché I had taken for granted...till now. I do not take anything for granted anymore.

A supportive family is the safety net around us, and this net is made stronger by friends....the net is made stronger by friends...and I'm saying this twice to drive home the point.

And blood may be thicker than water, but its water that quenches parched throats. And there is no ego where friends are involved. You are simply you, you are not the result of your education, job, automobile, mobile...to your friends you are the goof who makes them laugh, the one who gives good advice but refuses to take his own, the one who gets tricked into sponsoring a beer and pizza party.

So when with a friend...leave your ego outside the door. Listen, watch and speak...to what they say, why/how they say it, and more importantly what is being said.

And never ever think you can impress your friends with your salary or your job. I know I cant, I got here because of them, and I owe them my unflinching loyalty and friendship.